#136.

如果那一天我不曾和你相遇
那么我将不会拥有那份痛苦 悲伤
而又包含泪水的回忆

然而 若不是遇到你
我也无法体会那份愉悦 心动 珍贵 温暖
而又充满幸福的感觉

你在那儿过得好吗？

#135.

时间
一分一秒被偷走
所谓的永久
被曾经取代后
变成恶魔
手里握着多余的温柔
独自反复思索
收藏保留
随风飞走
说来轻松

自由
是否会比较好过
原来没有
成全的背后总有
痛苦在招手
记忆停留在最初时候
星光已不再闪烁
无话可说
继续走
还是朋友

让你走
我的爱失控
藏在幸福快乐的背后
是我
逃避退缩
放开手
对爱不再有奢求
是非对错不想再多说
眼神交会时候
出卖承诺
泪在留

想通
躲在黑暗的出口
难以捉摸
是缘份的作用
导致失控
还是孤独一时的冲动
抹去爱情轮廓
故事内容
谁补充
安静的尘封

世界的旋律因你而转动
就算再失控
落空
音符交织感动
就够

让你走
我不再是我
感受不到心跳的触碰
占有
转眼成空
放开手
对爱不再有奢求
徘徊梦中模糊脸孔
遗留在角落
不再轻易地经过

#134.

today has been a tiring day.

ALTHOUGH I HAD LIKE 7 PERIODS FREE.
HAHA.

spent 2 periods laughing with hock, afeeq and that PERVERTIC jinhwee.
and i caught this SUPER UNGLAM PHOTO of jinhwee.
I SHALL POST IT. WAHAHAHA.

before break was physics. BOO HOO. my test results sucked.
i studied, and i expected better marks. pbfth.

just as bell rang, i was still calculating the current thing, and hock asked: "吃什么?" i heard "是什么?"
thus i answered:"48."
you should have seen his face. blur until dunno how. HAHAHHAHA.
then i realised i heard the wrong thing.

skipped mt remedial and went lunch.
saw chang at ntuc.
really yuan jia lu zhai.
of all people, i see him.
he saw hock and me,
and the first thing he said was: now in public, behave urselves and dun be rash.
HAHAHAHA. like scared we will eat him up.
but IM SOOO HAPPY. he approved! im so gonna do that table. :DDDDDDD

please make up, and i really dont like such things to happen again. x))


"When something wonderful happened to me,

your eyes twinkled laughingly,
your fists clasped truimphantly
and you smiled approvingly at me.

I knew you were genuinely happy for me.

I hope I will keep you happy for a long time."

"When you came into my life,
you helped me see-

The good in ime,
The good that i have done for others, and
The good I could do for others.

The good in others,
The good that others have done for me, and
The good that others will do for me.

These days, I sense much much
more the many good things which are happening in my life."

i will wait.
11 november.

Till then,
♥ rachael.

#133.

RACHAEL LEARNT THAT SHE SHOULD ALWAYS BRING HER WALLET OUT WITH HER.

didnt go run this morning, cuz had to go to mandai.
went breakfast with dad&mum, and saw chun hian.
so fetched mummy to school and went back to pasir ris to pick auntie up.
went to mandai, and saw chun hian again. HAHHA.

so went there and look look see see.
then went lunch.
then they suddenly decided to walk tampines mall.

so walk walk see see buy buy, and had to go home with bro and sis.
but never bring wallet, so had to walk.
and wearing heels.
so, a lesson learnt.
must bring wallet. HAHA.

and i still love kelda&kelsi.
HAHA.

YAY. tmr got 3 free periods! :DDDDDD

HAAHAHAAHAHA.
xueyi kena stalked. HAHAHA.

i hate Q&A conversations.
i look back, pondered,
and i really dun know why things have turned out this way.
i miss you so.
i really miss you.

#132.

I turn off the time to wake up before the alarm clock ressounds
I don't know why but I can already remember you

I wonder if, before I know it, I'll forget
even the miracle of being able to meet you for one hundred minutes
Will I end up forgetting even that I've forgotten?

Heavenly days, in the room in the pocket of my heart
I look for your vanished warmth
Even if there's no way to feel you ever again, ah
I'm locking up those days that are still a bit warm

Tired of walking, I sat down and was at a loss, if you were with me
We could have talked about something like our unbearable dream's fate

I couldn't say it by the ticket barrier, I wanted to say
That I feel "Thank you" are maybe words
much sadder than "goodbye"

Heavenly days, I wonder if I could smile properly
At the scene of our last kiss, I couldn't even
grasp your shivering hands, not even my tears fell, ah
Now that it's too late, they overflow when I'm alone

Heavenly days, in the room in the pocket of my heart
I look for your vanished warmth
Even if there's no way to feel you ever again, ah
Even if I stretch out my hands, you're not here anymore
I'll walk on under a new light.


RACHAEL CAN PLAY THIS SONG ALREADY!
:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

#131.

SORRY SEEMS TO BE THE HARDEST WORD


What I got to do to make you love me?
What I got to do to make you care?
What do I do when lightning strikes me?
And I wake to find that you’re not there?

What I got to do to make you want me?
What I got to do to be heard?
What do I say when it’s all over?
Sorry seems to be the hardest word.

It’s sad, so sad
It’s a sad, sad situation.
And it’s getting more and more absurd.
It’s sad, so sad
Why can’t we talk it over?
Oh it seems to me
That sorry seems to be the hardest word.

What do I do to make you want me?
What I got to do to be heard?
What do I say when it's all over?
Sorry seems to be the hardest word.

It’s sad, so sad
It’s a sad, sad situation.
And it’s getting more and more absurd.
It’s sad, so sad
Why can’t we talk it over?
Oh it seems to me
That sorry seems to be the hardest word.

Yeh. Sorry

What I got to do to make you love me?
What I got to do to be heard?
What do I do when lightning strikes me?
What have I got to do?
What have I got to do?
When sorry seems to be the hardest word.

#130.

SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME HOW I CAN EARN 15K BY 2011.!

i cant wait to run tmr.
i cant wait to mahjong tmr.
i finally can touch those tiles.
:DDD

i've never played mahjong in my entire life okay,
so i would defintely be HYPER over it.
HAHA.

mr siow's temporary door is so cute.
barbie mattress cover. x))

oh yea. i know of a way to get 15k by 2011.
dun even need to be 2011.
by 2008 can liao.
HAHA.
i just need to be made paralysed in school.
insurance will pay me. XDDDDDDD

BOO HOO. i just received news that i wont get to play mahjong tmr.
BOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOO!

because hock's meeting his "gf" :X
and jing's gotta be home by 10.
am.
was happy for a moment. thought pm.
HAHAHA.
and i gotta work on my piano table!
someone help me draw, cuz i cant draw for nuts. :DDDD

rachael's holding it back.

#129.

RACHAEL'S LEARNT HER PAINFUL LESSON.

doctor prescribed mefenamic acid to me, think it's painkiller or something,
and it said: TAKE AFTER FOOD.

and i didnt, cuz i was having tuition, and i couldnt possibly take dinner to take medicine.
so thus, the acid was really. acidic. HAHA.

and it was really dramatic at tuition.
siow's glass door shattered into pieces. and i dun know how and why,
that harry didnt kena cut AT ALL.
imagine i was sitting there. omfg.
i would have died. not cuz of the glass, the shock. HAHA.

tmr still need to go down to polyclinic.
SIAN LAH. )))):

#128.

RACHAEL'S NOW AT WYS' HOUSE.
HAHAHAHA.

and, im not outside playing mahjong, cuz I DUN KNOW HOW TO! T.T
someone please teach me how to play. ))):

IM SOO DARN HAPPY I HAVE A FINALIZED IDEA.
and, i did it all by myself this time! :DDDD
i'll be doing a portable table to attach to a piano chair!
this is so that i can continue doing dnt without feeling bored.
((:

so inconvenient. can die everytime i climb the stairs. feels like the muscles are tearing.
but still, gonna run on sunday.
to prevent such things from happening again, and to be wanjing's pacer.
:DDD

OH, and i haven't gone to the polyclinic to get my refund back.
i dun see why they cannot tell im a singaporean. pbfth.

if having to fall out of love is this difficult,
i wont fall in love again.
never again.

rachael dont miss you.
rachael dont need you.
rachael's not thinking about you.
rachael will just let you be.
rachael will wait.
she will.

#127.

MY LIFE SUCKS. ):
esp yesterday. kena cought for hair in the morning. nearly cut my hair.
afeeq was saying, if they really cut, can write to the press.
wanjing scared until hands sweat. HHAHA.

then PE. passed NAPFA 2.4km. but got muscle injury in the end. shouldnt have choing-ed. )):
then had to go for last minute physics practical. hated it, cuz i was effing tired.
after that still go tuition, reached home only like 11pm.
HAIX.

then today go school, had difficulty breathing. was damn suffering. finally went to see doctor.
for once, i agreed.
but i hate the medicine part. )))):

#126.

My name is Gossip.
I have no respect for justice.
I maim without killing. I break hearts and ruin lives.
I am cunning, malicious and gather strength with age.
The more I am quoted, the more I am believed.
I flourish at every level of society.
My victims are helpless. They cannot protect themselves against me because I have no name and no face.
To track me down is impossible. The harder you try, the more elusive I become.
I am nobody's friend.
Once I tarnish a reputation, it is never the same.
I topple governments and wreak marriages. I ruin careers and cause sleepless nights, heartaches and indigestion. I spawn suspicion and generate grief. I make innocent people cry in their pillows. Even my name hisses.
I am called GOSSIP. Office gossip--Shop gossip--Party gossip--Telephone gossip. I make headlines and headaches. REMEMBER, before you repeat a story, ask yourself: is it true? Is it fair? Is it necessary?? If not, do not repeat it. KEEP QUIET.
GREAT minds discuss ideas... Average minds discuss events... Shallow minds discuss people... Which are you?

by Ann Landers.

#125.

"AN INSINCERE AND EVIL FRIEND IS MORE TO BE FEARED THAN A WILD BEAST; A WILD BEAST MAY WOUND YOUR BODY, BUT AN EVIL FRIEND WILL WOUND YOUR MIND."
as said by buddha.

jing said, dun have to say so much. these small quotes will tell alot. thus i decided to bold it and CAPS it. in case they missed it. xP

eileen told me something that i couldnt take. she said,"你看他，我看他喝 milk bottle，从早上 suck 到现在。"
i started to look around and see who was sucking the milk bottle. and when i saw it, i was like rofl lah. i then told jing and hock, same reaction. ITS DAMN HILARIOUS.

jing also got caught trying to attack hock with her ponytail. HAHAHAHA.

ARGH, tmr need to run. ))): i havent trained for 1234567890 lightyears!
maybe i should consider swimming training later.
but i DUN WANNA DAMAGE MY HAIR!
unclejack should be more than glad to pay for it, hor? HAHAHA.

Love can sometimes be magic. But magic can sometimes... just be an illusion.
-Javan.

i really dun understand why you cant answer a simple question. have you gotten over me? if it's really that hard telling me, then i suppose i wont ask again. until 11 nov.
Were you happy?

#124.

SORRY RONALD!! )):

i really didnt expect my mum to ask felicia about it.
and i dun know what the f*ck is happening at yamaha now.
IN THE FIRST PLACE, i shouldnt have called and asked about the polish.
IN THE FIRST PLACE, i shouldnt have asked for the drum.
i dun know lah!

i seriously cannot understand why she's so hard up for that 8%, 25%, and 30% even.

i dunno lah. i just feel so pissed off now.
in short, sorry!

#123.

.

If I Let You Go - Westlife

Day after day
Time passed away
And I just can't get you off my mind
Nobody knows, I hide it inside
I keep on searching but I can't find

The courage to show to letting you know
I've never felt so much love before

And once again I'm thinking about
Taking the easy way out

But if I let you go I will never know
What my life would be holding you close to me
Will I ever see you smiling back at me? (oh yeah)
How will I know
if I let you go?

Night after night I hear myself say
Why can't this feeling just fade away
There's no one like you (no one like you)
You speak to my heart (speak to my heart)
It's such a shame we're worlds apart

I'm too shy to ask, I'm too proud to lose
But sooner or later I gotta choose
And once again I'm thinking about
Taking the easy way out

But if I let you go I will never know
What my life would be, holding you close to me
Will I ever see you smiling back at me?
oh yeah
How will I know
if I let you go ?

If I let you go ooooh baby
Ooooooooohhhhh

Once again I'm thinking about
Taking the easy way out
Ooooooooohhhhh

But if I let you go I will never know
What my life would be, holding you close to me
close to me
Will I ever see you smiling back at me?
oh yeah
How will I know
if I let you go?
But if I let you go I will never know
Will I ever see you smiling back at me?
How will I know
if I let you go ?

#122.

A name in the sand will never last,
The waves come rolling into shore high and fast.
And wash the lines away,
But not the memories we shared that day
Where we have trod this sandy shore,
Our traces we left there will be no more.
But, wherever we are,
The memories will never be far.
Although I may not be with you,
Know that my love for you will always be true.
Those memories will last forever,
And in them we shall always be together.
Hold them close to your heart,
And know that from your side I will never part.

#121.

I AM SOO GONNA LEARN THIS SONG. XDDDDDDD



有多少爱能重来
多少人愿意等待
失去之後才明白

走进回忆的安排
一幕一幕的对白
上演我们的未来

期待 原来是一种伤害
深爱的人已离开
是我不该 忽略你给我的爱

现在我只想 回到最初的时候
不愿让你再泪流
寂寞时侯 只有你会陪着我

现在我只想 回到最初的时候
我知道你还爱着我
亲爱的你 请你握紧我的手
请你看看我 真的需要你的我
一切重头
只要你回头

#120.

i think i didnt explain the video below. HAHA.
it's done last week chemm's prac.
some liquid plus nitric acid and some nitrate. HAHA.
i dun remember the exact term, but this has successfully awed me.

I FORGOT TO BRING MY HISTORY TEXTBOOK! T.T
ms junainah was like. too bad. cant help you. stand outside class lor.
haiz. although it wasnt out of the class, but i still had to stand for 1hr 10min.
when entering the class, was telling afeeq, must sit until shiok first.
then jinhwee and him started to get horny.
details i shant explain, but it was gross enough to get my goospimples appearing. xP

and IM SO DAMN PISSESD OFF.
its true that leopards never changes its spots.
copycats will always be copycats.

seriously, im not afraid that you might see it.
i can bold and enlarge it for you.

STOP BEING A COPYCAT, WILL YOU?
GET OFF MY BACK!! D:

argh. this is really pissing.
first i bake cookies for v day, you bake too. and then lie to us about baking agar agar. yeah. with flour and choco chips huh.
then i do cross stitch, you do knitting.
WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO PROVE?
DUN TELL ME IT AIN'T THE SAME.
pftbh.
and please, for goodness sakes, stop trying to prove something in front of us.
it dosent affect us to know that you are still in contact with them.
we dun give a shyt. :D
and dun tell me things like it's not worth doing this and that. im old enough to know what im doing.
if you think that's the case, then please look into the mirror and see what you're doing. doing things exactly the same as us.
and STOP GIVING OTHERS THE IMPRESSION THAT WE ARE COPYING YOU, CUZ YOU KNOW, I KNOW, JING KNOWS, WHO IS COPYING WHO.

okay, enough of this FA LAO SAO-ING. HAHA.

had our first speech day rehearsal, and it's DAMN FUNNY TO SEE THE WAY NICK WALKS AND GET PISSED BY "ANIMAL".
i simply love his EYE CONTACT. xDDDDD

#119.

The Cascades - A Rag by Scott Joplin(1868-1917)


IM SO GONNA LEARN THIS SONG. ((:

surprised that i'll want to learn this song. cuz im not really into impressionism. but dunno which screw loose, now i wanna learn this song. ^^

Polonaise in A Major ("Military") by Frederic Chopin(1810-1849)


and this song, I"VE BEEN WANTING TO LEARN IT. but fingers too short. T.T
3/4 of this song require me to stretch beyond my max. )))):
nevermind, i'll learn the duet and find someone to play with me. xD

Wedding Day at Troldhaugen by Edvard Grieg(1843-1907)


and this song, i'll learn this song and play it at cousin's wedding soon, hopefully. ^^

AND I'VE COMPLETED CHOPIN'S WALTZ! :DDDDD

#118.

okay, i just realised, i didnt give much details last night. HAHA.



morning, tuition. left early though, cuz went to attend a english workshop, conducted by mrs marife cruz yap. SUPER DUPER GOOD, and i think it has helped.



after that went to orchard to meet mummy, she helped us buy tickets as she could get discount with her ocbc credit.

after that went to look at shoes, but didnt buy in the end, cuz it wasnt really good. so went lunch. initially walked to taka to get food, but it was damn crowded. so went to wisma. crowded too, but we were too hungry to carry on walking. and then we decided, we must eat something we cannot find in pasir ris and tampines. hock then bought wanton noodles. food can be found at tampines and pasir ris, but cost cannot. 6 BUCKS. like WOW. so darn expensive lah. jing and i had nicer food. and of course cheaper than hock's. nice and cheap some more.

recommendation: wisma atria's food republic sells v good hokkien mee. HAHA.



we then thought of haagen daz ice cream, but in the end had those ice cream on the streets. nice and good. HAHA.



then proceeded on to paragon, and was telling wanjing, dun look left and right in paragon. just walk straight. that's because, their stuff is DAMN EXPENSIVE. and too high class for us to go. HAHA. imagine us carrying a gucci tote bag to school. like forget it. we're not paying such money. HAHA. then went to heeren, wanted to take neoprints, then realised it's gone.
erm. abit slow, but better late than never. HHAHA. so went back to cineleisure before it started to rain. then told jing, at cineleisure, if there was a guy who approached us to do some survey, then it probably means we're not quite bad. HAHA. but no one did until after the movie. (:

went to take neoprints, and cuz jing was WEARING A GREEN BLOUSE, she constantly "changed" blouses. red bg, red blouse. blue bg, blue blouse. HAHAHA.

the show: FANTASTIC.
dun know how to talk about it, but it's just soo nice and ..
HAHA.

after the movie, a guy did approach us to do some survey. but the guy kinda dun meet our standard. HAHA. he went like, thankyou very much, enjoy your day. i was thinking, my day is ending and you tell me to enjoy my day. HAHA.

then took 65 home, and when i told hock and jing to alight and change to 21, they thought i was lying to them. cuz i think i looked sleepy. but i didnt see wrongly okay! it was the right bus stop! HAHA.

and that was how my day was.
BTW, CINELEISURE ORCHARD'S SEATS ARE DIRTY. D:
got a mosquito bite on my thigh. )):

#117.

SKY OF LOVE IS SO DAMN NICE.
didnt expect myself to cry,
but THANKS TO JING,
i've cried. a little.

we reached cineleisure at 2, they started only at 6.
so we went to eat, play and crapped.
but everything seems to empty without you.

if having to fall out of love is this difficult,
i wont fall in love again.

#116.

STUPID HOCK!
HAHA. i was just too engrossed in the show. HAHA.

the book is REALLY interesting. xD
if i still have the time, i'll type one story out. ^^

i didnt know i had another daughter. when jing told me, i was like. when?
she said, when u and hock at india. WTF. HAHA.

AND DNT SUCK BIG TIME. )):

thought of the finalized idea, and practically spent the whole day thinking about it.
at first wanted to do a stand for the violinist, but it dont make sense for the violinist to be steeping on pedals to turn the pages.
thought long and hard, decided to use the piano once again. but still not sure if it'll work out.
ahh, who cares.
if i can do it, i'll just do so. if not. then i'll drop at most.

LUCKY AFEEQ, can just modify.
EEE. so jealous. xPP

and i'll be watching sky of love on friday!
and since i've no date, mummy will go with me.

i'm doing what you'd want me to do.
are you happy with it?
say yes, cuz i dun wanna do it for nothing. (:

#115.

RACHAEL HAS TO ATTEND SPEECH DAY CUM PRIZE GIVING CEREMONY! ((:
and this time, im not going to attend it as the audience,
im going as a prize receiver! :DDD

anw, was to go to the hall for the briefing,
while waiting, and no teacher was going to appear,
we went to bang on the piano for awhile.
LOOK NICE, PLAY NOT NICE.
the piano sucked like hell.
so anw, wanted to try out the song i was working on last night,
but i was starting to enjoy the piano,
warmed up, but the teacher just had to come.
))):

I WILL STILL TRY TONIGHT. XDDD

people who needs to take the prize consisted of me, hock, jing, yuanling, eileen and others.
and they told me, our whole family is gonna take prize.
i then said, cuz got clever father and clever mother,
so got clever children. HAHAH.
and hock and i kept telling them to report for printing of wrong surname. xPP

was reading this chinese novel, and there were alot of quotes in there,
jing and i started to translate them into english. AND IT SUCKED. HAHA.

明明知道食品过期就不新鲜，为了他的一句誓言，你却放弃了自己的鲜度。所以，等待是有期限的，在你失鲜之前，结束等待。

the translation was: already know food expired is not fresh, but because of one promise of his, you gave up your own freshness. so, waiting is got limit one, before you lose your freshness, stop waiting!

okay, this translation was more like the singlish version. but it was damn funny.

this is why i love reading books i chance upon. rather than looking for a specific book. i'll end up not reading it. ^^

I WAS SO DAMN EXCITED AND HAPPY OVER THE YAKULT SELLING THING.
totally fabulous! the moment i knew they sold yakult, that was it.
of course, i suffered the side effects.
but who cares? I ENJOYED THE YAKULT. ((((((:

RACHAEL MISSES EVERYTHING. ):
RACHAEL WANTS EVERYTHING TO BE NORMAL. )):

#114.

RACHAEL FAILED HER SS COMMON TEST. ))))):

luckily there will be a re test, and i MUST do well for it man.

borrowed a book on headaches just now, and while reading it in the bus, i've found out the cause of my headaches.
when reading that book, i was like agreeing all the way about the things they wrote in the book, and its so true. they listed out reasons that may have caused headaches, and it could keep track of what exactly is the cause.

I've found my reason.
amines, stress and hypoglycemia.
Amines is a group of vasoactive, nitrogen-based protein. It is often present in aged foods like cheese, yogurt, and yakult. )):
I LOVE YAKULT. )):

hypoglycemia is caused by excessive dieting, or fasting.
to avoid hypoglycemia, eat frequently, don't skip meals, and eat complex carbohydrates.

T.T

fyi, I DUN DIET. i just dun find time to eat. BUT I DO EAT, i DUN FAST. :P

well, at least i've found the reasons to the headaches. better than nothing. XD

went walk walk with hock, jing, eileen and yuanling.
all of us nearly died at mac. x)
AND, whitesands' neoprint shop suck like hell.

friday, or saturday, will be watching sky of love with jing and hock.
just the three of us. sounds good,
but the sense of loss is nevertheless there, and staying strong. ):
RACHAEL IS STILL TRYING TO RECOVER FROM THE SETBACK. ))):

#113.

went to meet ronald just now,
and found out lots of stuff that happened within yamaha while i wasnt around.
it suddenly dawned upon me,
that im living in a hard and cruel world.
people i know suddenly dun seem like what i know.

i feel so insecure in the world.
there is no one i can trust.

i've made up my mind,
im not going to return to yamaha tampines.

its true that every company have their own politics,
but this is really too much for me to take.

she's just an old lady, with children that suck.
that's why she's still working at this age.

i dun need much brain knowledge to know why lendro left now.

YAMAHA TAMPINES SUCK BIG TIME. ):

im glad ronald will leave with me. :D

#112.

Everybody's got something they had to leave behind
One regret from yesterday that just seems to grow with time
There's no use looking back or wondering
How it could be now or might have been
Oh this I know but still I can't find ways to let you know

I've never had a dream come true
Till the day that I found you
Even though I pretend that I've moved on
You'll always be my baby
I never found the words to say
You're the one I think about each day
And I know no matter where life takes me to
A part of me will always be with you

Somewhere in my memory
I've lost all sense of time
And so my road can never be cos yesterday is all that fills my mind
There's no use looking back or wondering
How it could be now or might have been
Oh this I know but still I can't find ways to let you go

I've never had a dream come true
Till the day that I found you
Even though I pretend that I've moved on
You'll always be my baby
I never found the words to say
You're the one I think about each day
And I know no matter where life takes me to
A part of me will always be

You'll always be the dream that fills my head
Yes you will, say you will, you know you will
Oh baby, you'll always be the one I know I'll never forget
There's no use looking back or wondering
Because love is a strange and funny thing
No matter how I try and try I just can't say goodbye
No no no no

I've never had a dream come true
Till the day that I found you
Even though I pretend that I've moved on
You'll always be my baby
I never found the words to say (words to say)
You're the one I think about each day
And I know no matter where life takes me to
A part of me will always be
A part of me will always be with you

#111.

if one day you feel like crying,
call me.
i dont promise that i will make you laugh,
but i can cry with you.

if one day you want to run away,
call me.
i dont promise to ask you to stop,
but i can run with you.

if one day you dont want to listen to anyone,
call me.
i promise to be there for you
but also promise to remain quiet.

but if one day you call and there's no answer,
come fast to see me.
perhaps i need you.

TIME FOR RACHAEL TO MUG FOR DNT AND HOMEWORK. ):

#110.

i suddenly remembered this super funny thing.
we were having lunch, when mummy asked if we wanted to order fried carrot cake.
we were like, half past six about it, and godpa went to buy for us.

guess what he came back with.

over 10 pieces of carrot cake. those real carrot cakes.
we were like, WTH?
laughing our asses off, then he went to get the correct kind of carrot cake.
he came back with 3 plates.
omfg, there were like only 6 of us.
had a hard time finishing it.

it then dawned upon me, i have a REALLY REALLY CUTE GODPA. XD

oh,
jing was harassed by this crazy man.
both hock and her came to my place,
i called that no. with my house phone,
and put him on loudspeaker.
i was like,
"may i know who called?"
he said:
"what's your no.?"
me:
"huh?"
him:
"what's your no.? MISS~~"

upon hearing that miss in mandarin, i hung up.
SUPER DUPER DISGUSTING.
hock then tried to call and pretended to be a gay,
which i think aint a difficult task for him, :P
but the convo didnt carry on after he realised it was a guy calling.

we then went to report to the police,
and the policemen there, super senang.
it's damn funny when u see the way they work and joke about things.
something that you wouldnt expect from them.

and attitude is super important for the frontline.
i've seen the drastic difference.




better late then never. (:


i wanna watch this show. ):
but i have no date. )):
who would like to watch it with me? ))):

#109.

RACHAEL HOPES SHE CAN PASS.

the paper was quite okay, and that means i either know my work, or i totally dun know.
and i got this handsome invilgilator!
mummy was saying, you must have done the paper in 5 minutes, and spent the next 2hrs 55 minutes looking at him.
like YEAH. as if. i spent two hours doing it, and the next hour checking can?
but it's undeniable, he is handsome. haha.
he reminded me of Mr Toh.
gosh, i miss mr toh. ):

and SMU's escalator sucks big time. the escalator starts moving only when someone steps on it.
energry conservation i suppose, but i was halfway down when the escalator stopped moving!.
i must be either too light, or, no other possibilities. HAHA.

dun know why in the world i wore heels, but my feet has loads of blisters. T.T

after that went to nsc to pick sister up, and i saw sherman! :DDDDD
i love his tan. XD

then went to yamaha, supposed to go to brother's dunno what observation, but in the end did catching up with jenna. SOO MISS HER. think she's one i missed the most from the school side.
we talked alot, everything and anything, and i didnt go to brother's whatsoever observation.

I MISS YAMAHA. ):
told liza, when i return, i must be the cashier someday!

SPECIAL THANKS TO RONALD LEONG,
for everything. your bro appreciates it alot. xP
and, im not the pigeon, im not the duck, im not the chicken.
whatever i am or not, i'll turn you into the frog later.
you shall croak at 4 today. :D

yesterday was rickyKOR's birthday,
and he definitely didnt expect me to remember.
im glad i called though,
many memories would return.

RACHAEL HOPES TO UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING.
RACHAEL IS TRYING HARD TO GET OVER IT.
RACHAEL IS FAILING BADLY. ):

#108.

I'm looking out the window
Where we sat to watch the stars
There's a chill within the air
It makes my heart long for your touch
You may be miles away
But as I kneel to pray

I see the same side of the moon
That we'll be looking on when the world turns blue
And know that time and space can't come between me and you
We share the same side of the moon
And though you'll never see all the tears shine through
I know I can't be that far from you
If we're both looking on the same side of the moon

I picture you across the ocean
In your corner of the world
I pray the wind will blow my voice
And gently whisper in your ear
Your night may be my day
And though the seasons change

It's still the same side of the moon
That we'll be looking on when the world turns blue
And know that time and space can't come between me and you
We share the same side of the moon
And though you'll never see all the tears shine through
I know I can't be that far from you
If we're both looking on the same side of the moon
I know I can't be that far from you
If we're both looking on the same side of the moon

#107.

TOMORROW'S THE PAPER! T.T

rachael's so gonna flunk it.

after this paper, will concentrate on piano diploma, and is so gonna learn this song.
enjoy.
Rachmaninov's Moment Musical No. 4.



well, promised leonard, jordon and daniel that i'll learn this song,
in 3 years. now's not even one year. so i can still take my time.
firstly, my fingers are too short. will have a hard time mastering this piece.

meanwhile, i'll still continue my chopin waltz, which i stopped for theory.

Chopin's Waltz in C# Minor. enjoy,



i've also finished learning this song, and can play it well already.
rather happy that i did it in a short time,
rather sad that there's no one to listen to it.
next time, if i ever have the chance. i'll play it once again.
Jay Chou's Ju Hua Tai.



special thanks to my friends for their concern and support.
they're not forgotten.

RACHAEL'S TRYING HER BEST TO DIVERT HER ATTENTION.

#106.

It's a long long journey
Till I know where I'm supposed to be
It's a long long journey
And I don't know if I can believe
When shadows fall and block my eyes
I am lost and know that I must hide
It's a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you

Many days I've spent
Drifting on through empty shores
Wondering what's my purpose
Wondering how to make me strong

I know I will falter
I know I will cry
I know you'll be standing by my side
It's a long long journey
And I need to be close to you

Sometimes it feels no one understands
I don't even know why
I do the things I do
When pride builds me up till I can't see my soul
Will you break down these walls and pull me through

Cause It's a long long journey
Till I feel that I am worth the price
You paid for me on calvary
Beneath those stormy skies

When Satan mocks and friends turn to foes
It feels like everything is out to make me lose control
Coz' It's a long long journey
Till I find my way home to you
To you

#105.

it's true, i've experienced it.
crying does make one hungry.
didnt have breakfast yesterday, didnt have lunch, and after dinner, my stomach did growled.

i've lost my smile.
i've lost myself in the process of getting through it.

well, i did study practically the whole day.
once in a while it did drift.
or rather, often.

i feel lost.

rachael's not suffering.

RACHAEL'S ON THE VERGE.

#104.

I can't sleep
everything i ever knew
It's a lie
without you

I can't breathe
when my heart is broke in two
There's no beat
without you

You're not gone
but you're not here
It's that's the way it seems tonight
If we could try to end these wars
I know that we can make it right

cause baby
I don't wanna fight no more
I forgot what we were fighting for
and this lonelyness that's in my heart
won't let me be apart from you
I don't wanna have to try
to live without you in my life
So i'm hoping we can start tonight
cause i don't wanna fight
no more

How can I leave
when everything that I adore
and everything I'm living for
it's in you
I can't dream
sleepless nights have got me bad
The only dream i ever had
is being with you
I know that we can make it right
It's gonna take a little time
Lets not leave ourselves with no way out
lets not cross that line

I don't wanna fight no more
I forgot what we were fighting for
and this lonelyness that's in my heart
won't let me be apart from you
I don't wanna have to try
to live without you in my life
So i'm hoping we can start tonight
cause i don't wanna fight
no more

Remember that i made a vow
that i would never let you go
I meant it then
I mean it now
and i want to tell you so

I don't wanna fight no more
I forgot what we were fighting for
and this lonelyness that's in my heart
won't let me be apart from you
I don't wanna have to try
to live without you in my life
So i'm hoping we can start tonight
cause i don't wanna fight
no more...
I don't wanna fight no more
I forgot what we were fighting for
and this lonelyness that's in my heart
won't let me be apart from you
I don't wanna have to try
to live without you in my life
So i'm hoping we can start tonight
cause i don't wanna fight
no more.......
It's all a lie
Without you
without you......

#103.

RACHAEL'S FEELING DARN LOUSY NOW.
RACHAEL'S HEAD IS SPINNING.
RACHAEL HOPES THIS IS JUST A NIGHTMARE, AND EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE WHEN SHE WAKES UP.
RACHAEL DO NOT WANT TO CRY EVER AGAIN.

#102.

When you break a girl's heart, you'll be remembered for either the hurt you gave her, or the happiness you gave her.

#101.

today was bad.
woke up in the morning, found out golden village dun screen sky of love,
found out all timings suck,
and was late for tuition.

it was also damn crowded, his schedule corked up.
then released late, raining heavily,
got drenched,
left my comb on the bus,
and was not allowed to class.
WHY? cuz i was wearing my class tee.
WTF. still ask me to report to mrs wong.
i then went, and the first thing she said was,
oh! NICE SHIRT!
gosh. i didnt know whether to laugh, or to pull a long face.
already not feeling exactly good, and the miss still rubbed it in.
i should not have rushed.
shouldnt even have gone to school.

but at least i completed my amaths. :D

after that went to watch 2 faces of my girlfriend.
it was damn comical at the beginning,
then sad when was nearing the end.

was raining heavily on the way home,
and was drenched again.
by the time i reached home,
my headache and fever was back again.
i should have listened to daddy and kept an umbrella in my bag. ):

in case anyone was curious about what i did yesterday,
i did chocolates. XD
just melted them and mould. simple and sweet. HAHA.
i mean, the chocolates are sweet. HAHAHA.

have been doing some thinking lately,
afraid to do certain things.
i love my life now.
of course i dont love the grades.
but i dun believe i will do any better if he had to leave me.
i just wanna keep things as they are.
i dont want any changes.

#100.

the hundredth post of this blog. :DDD

i'd like to remind jun and bev,
they once said my blog wouldnt last.
HAHAHA. 100th post okay, mai siao siao. HAHA.

last night had a really late dinner, and the food seemed bad to me.
initially was sitting outside, then it started to rain.
we then had to go in, and then we lost our chilli, tea and everything.
dinner ytd, in short, was damn bad.
we also celebrated dom's bday, and the cake was like. omfg-ing fat.

went home like 11 plus, dunno why got inspiration, went to do dnt.
okay, daddy said it looks kiddo. but i like it. haha.

supposed to meet hock and jing before going for chem, but was late. so didnt meet.
then saw eileen, and we still thought we werent late. but actually we were. sian.
luckily they just started.
hock and i then went down to dover, met up with jun and dear,
then went home, wanting to find the book of recipes, but couldnt.
searched high and low, then finally found it.

went to east point to eat, and was threatened. BOO HOO.
haha.
anw, i searched for the book for nothing. end up oso never bake cake.
what i did, i'll blog about it another time.

tmr, shall be the last day i slack for the march holidays. after that have to mug.
theory exam on sat. T.T

#99.

cant explain it, i dun know why i keep remembering the past.
my daddy used to sing these 2 songs to me to bed every night when i was young.
enjoy. (:

#98.

these two pics depicts my life when in the library.
YEAH RIGHT. they dun show the noisy part. HAHA.
but thats also because nobody took it.
so, im not exactly that bad. HAHAA.
one look, and you can tell it's me because of the distinct clip. HAHA.

i dun even remember this. i have never thought i was sitting down, instead of hyper-ing.

HAHAHA.

just received this, the first two pictures was taken from hock's paper.
you wun believe this, he wrote calcium, but drew chlorine.

as for mine, i think it's equally moronic.
i drew too many shells, as you can see from wat grace wrote.
and that's because i mistook the atomic mass for proton number.

was browsing through my pictures, when i saw these old pictures.
was laughing at the screen, and thought of putting these up.
memories also came back to me, and i was reminded of grandad.
i miss him. ):

I LOVE THEM. PERIOD.
MY BESTIES. ((:

i miss the days we psycho-ed together.
this was taken 1 hour before my birthday, and i was really happy. XD
and, i still cannot believe he's the one. xP
the combo guys. i remember laughing like mad when i saw this.
they look exactly like morons. :D
this was taken during graeme morton workshop.

I SUDDENLY MISS MUSIC. )):

#97.

SHAGGED.

i have LOTS to do.
tmr's piano lesson, homework not completed.
wed have to hand in folio, i havent even started on it.
next week's music theory exam, i have not even finish revising.

okay, i better stop.

anw, today was PTM.
i went in slippers, cuz my shoes were dirty from ytd's X-country.
and everyone was like diverting their attention to me.
what's wrong with slippers?
okay, i admit the green was kind of striking. haha.

mrs wong wasnt there, so we had to go to mr yap.
and i failed my languages. T.T
AND, i scored 10% for dnt.

WOW, that i could have gotten 10% for not doing anything,
and WTH for giving afeeq and i 10%, while jinhwee and hock got 20!

AND, everyone thinks hock's my boyf.
SHUCKS, both of us feel equally disgusted. HAHA.
WE ARE ONLY BEST OF FRIENDS.
THE CHARLIE ANGELS, THE THREE MUSKETEERS. :D

im so happy, i found the LEAP YEARS's soundtracks! XD

i cant wait till tuesday! XDD

#96.

RACHAEL IS FEELING VEXED.
she dun know what to do to help make him less stressed.
:(((

ANW, 5/1 won first runner up for the cheering competition! :D
really didnt expect it, as the class was really separated and NOT united.
BUT, things still turned out well.
what a waste, mrs wong wasnt around to share the joy with us.

X-country, i skipped it.
or rather, hock and i skipped it.
initially intended to just pretend to have stomachache and skip the running part,
but my wish came true. seriously had stomachache.
and to make things worse, he didnt meet me for dinner. T.T

OH, and i was stalked by a cat two nights ago. while waiting. there was this cat that scared me, and kept following me. now see cats will shock for awhile. BOO HOO.

AND I SO LOVE THE FLOWERS WE GOT FOR aFeeQ. :DDD
russian chrysanthemum they call it. HAHA.

chanced upon this at the florist, and i am still so interested in it. (:

this was taken during chem practical. some chemical analysis with sodium hydroxide.
ammonia gas i think. HAHA. the results were the most important. HAHA.

this, obviously is my favourite. (:

IM SO NOT CONTENTED. that's bad. HAHA.
im sorry im greedy. cant help it. HAHA.
whoever can help him please do. i DO NOT know what to say to help.
sorry, i admit im useless. ):

#95.

FINALLY SAW HIM AGAIN. :DDD

went to watch the leap years with him, hockie and wanjing.
i loved it. (:

think if i was her, i would have died. HAHHA.
watch the show, then you'll know what im talking about. XD

after that went to buy wallet. i must be so dumb.
he said i waste money. T.T
haha. anw, bought it, changed it, then realised that actually my old wallet seems better. so i changed back to the old one again. HAHA.
guess i'll change it only when im bored again. HAHAHA.

RACHAEL'S SICK AND TIRED OF STUDYING MUSIC.
and she SO FEEL LIKE FENCING AGAIN.